How I Feel Right Now

Hi, this picture represents how I feel right now.

ugh

This picture represents that path I should take.

where i should go

This picture represents the path I want to take.

the path i want to go

This picture represents a random in between that I have no idea where it leads but for some reason it seems the most reasonable and the most risky right now.

somewhere idk

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How to string me along into your schemes

Her: I’m feeling angsty WANNA committ some arson?
It can be legal.

Me. Ooooh temping.
What do you have in mind?

Her: Small bonfire? Bricks and a fire in the middle bc the beach is too far
Idk I just want fire

Me: I want to burn things in it
Like barbie dolls

Her: Oh good idea.

Me: But that’s expensive

Her: Nah we can go to the 99 cent store

Me: And would probably smell bad

Her: Okay how about vegetables
We can set aside money to go to 99 cent store
And buy stuff we wanna burn

Me: Sounds good

Her: Okay after finals?

Me: Yeeee down

I need a burst of creative writing.

Rosa Parks occasionally asks me to help her on school essays and I become jealous. She actually gets to do quite interesting writing projects. I, on the other hand, have not been assigned a decent essay in awhile. As in, I disliked one of my English teachers with a passion because I probably have not developed a single skill the entire time I was imprisoned in his class. Welp.

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It’s pity I believe.

I’ve been…fragile lately? But at the same time, it’s difficult. I don’t think I’ve ever been in a moment like now where I felt so lost, so confused, so alone, and so… fragile? It’s pity I believe.

Sometimes I wonder, Why is he so sad? Then I wonder Why am I so sad? I have no reason to be sad! But in the end, the tears stream for reasons I know not. And the two meet at my chin in a subtle embrace before elegantly falling off the face of Earth. My whole world becomes sad.

My favorite thing to do when I’m alone is sleep. My least favorite thing to do when I’m alone is wallow in self pity. Which one is more productive? Neither. Instead, I inevitably fall into one and attempt to escape it with the other.

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What I do while in Philosophy

Taking a 3 hour class on a Tuesday night is not very enjoyable… especially when it’s philosophy. One can only sit and think about all the wonders of life for so long. Or, according to Descartes, one can only dream of listening to philosophy for so long. *sigh*

Let’s continue on the basis that life is just a means to attempt to keep the world continuing.

Let’s just assume that the emotions and well-being of our souls don’t matter at all. 

The world doesn’t care if you’re happy.

You’re like a mere pawn that is used as a part of a system, only to be thrown away once you’re done. 

What a sad and unfortunate thought.